Saturday, September 05, 2009

Linda spared while I become coma girl

The good news is that Linda indeed has a job. That is about the entire extent of the Good News. The idea of ‘efficiency’ in the government is to tell people on Monday that they could be fired, I mean laid off, I mean completely broke and then not tell them until late Thursday or so that they are not fired (except those they fired).

It seems they honestly believe that saying, “for the good of the budget” would have everyone working hard that spare time instead of: talking to union reps, talking to the excluded member reps, talking to everyone in the break room, talking about it in emails, talking about it to each other and mooching around depressed. We are in the Dictatorship of Gordon Campbell and some find that less that reassuring. Particularly when their job ‘Customer Service’ changes in four weeks from helping people to simply giving out bad news and then being yelled at by senior management and Deputy Ministers of other departments. Yes, this is an ad for people to join government work, why do you ask?

So, after everyone fidgeting and waiting for the “Could you please step into my office” bit for what seemed EVER, Linda was told in a mass email that the killing, er, firing, er, lay offs, was done for now. So she called me and said, “I am NOT motivated.” Odd, didn’t feel like jumping back in and having people yell at her? What kind of leadership is that?

I guess this sucks particularly since she is owed a raise from two years ago, and in the same message that said people are going to be laid off, it also said that there would be no raises for three years (other than our Great Dictator and his cronies). Our rent goes up, my meds go up, it is a not great future when my dying quicker is how to maintain a quality of life.Ironically, VIHA and my care workers only have to wait two years until a raise. But that’s because they took an 8 week course, not a degree and years in management, project management and the rest.

The second thing Linda said upon getting home is “Geez, I really want to read a romance!” And so she researched her fav authors, found a few books she had missed and added some to MY wish list (???), some are a few cents, a dollar I think. And I think when we have time is going to the library (when we have time – since now, with declining health, seizures and not breathing people seem to not want to leave me alone, like care workers, Linda and Cheryl. They hide the concern by saying things like, “I don’t want to leave you alone, what if you die on me.” Or “I’m not leaving you here, have you seen what you look like?”)

We have been too busy mending string and doing the ‘we are all saving like crazy’ thing to have time to read or relax together. I am glad we are going to Hawaii before the rainy season but a month later would have been nicer financially. The multiple doctor visits (after the ‘meet and greet’ I needed to do a walk-in or two), and due to the lack of blood to my arms, I went to Badminton. When you never bruise and you get in a funk and cut yourself and don’t get blood, and then cut OVER the same cut and don’t get blood. That is a high motivator. So I played badminton and the coordinator was very surprised to see me as ‘he had heard things….not good things’ about my health. Which I realized later meant ‘dead’. Nope, not dead yet. It was 24 guys and us and two females and seemed it was like that a lot as the guys acted like a female on the court wasn’t worth even introducing themselves to. They talked only to each other (even if on opposite courts) and played the ‘Oh well, let me do what I need to in order to leave here’ game. Linda’s male pairing kept staring off court to see how OTHER games were going on…..during a point. Plus I had the joy of being yelled at being too close to the court because my wheelchair had to wheel (not on the court at all) past people. Because this was COMPETITIVE...listed as recreational badminton. Why do some people do that, make fun things not so?

But since my nerves were slower, I was hitting too late or not even able to react to fast moving birdies. I will need a strategy for that. But I won one game and lost one, but the two of us female were making a comeback (my female partner looked at me crazy when I said, at 8-14 that it was time for our comeback – 15 is game), we made it up to 11-15 by the time the birdie dropped. Hey like 2 to 1 score with game point is going to slow me down!

So mixed feelings but pain, pain, pain and then punked the next day (Thursday) when I could hardly move an arm to answer the phone to find out that Linda wasn’t motivated.
Friday, to top off the evening, on which I had a stupid fight about whether I was a ‘real person’ or not (I was in the ‘I’m not’ because things seemed in the ‘sucky’ pile and even sick, ill, dying people, particularly females still get moody and depressed). It is odd that I am not always a beam of sunshine, but that’s true. Anyway, what happened for most of the day is unclear as I had several clusters of seizures, then stopped breathing, then, um, I dunno. But Cheryl and Linda said I had more seizures including one where my jaw kept dislocating (wow, so sad I missed that fun, huh, aren’t you?!). Which followed by me going into a coma, or a semi coma as they each tried twice (or was it three times from Linda?) to get me conscious but I did not respond to external stimuli, and when I did manage to respond, I did not attain consciousness.

I did however have a dream just before I woke that I was fencing Bart Barker from Wheel of Fortune and took a marshmallow off the tip of his sword to win the bout. If you wanted to know about the visions us coma gals see of the afterlife, make of that what you will!

After waking fully from the coma, I went back to sleep. Only to be woken by a seizure which made all the muscles in my back feel like there were snakes in my skin. It was FAR less fun than that ride where they take you up eight stories and drop you before slowing down at the last second. Since it went on for many, many minutes and there was absolutely no way to stop it.

Once I tried to get up it was incredibly difficult to get coordinated movement, someone had indeed thrown a wrench into the gears of my brain. I blame one of the Spice Girls. I am convinced that one of them, ala Dorian Grey (Now Doreen Grey?), has a portrait as the more odd things she puts up her nose to get high the more I have mysterious illnesses.

The GOOD news is that I woke from the coma with the power to see into the future. Precognition however did not give me fame or fortune but as I tried to return to my life as a tutor now instead of a teacher, I was view with suspicion and hostility. Which I think rather odd because I was fated to shoot one of the presidents, and that usually is someone who everyone says, “Gosh, he was always the one chuckling about something....all by himself in the corner.” (Has there ever been a female assassin?).

Um, in reality land, I had a fever, I was not that coordinated and in a bit of pain, but it seems that a coma can be um, if not viewed as a sort of disturbing trend for the future then something that mucks up the here and now (that's how I choose to see it!). Because not only were vital plans lost, but now I am behind by many hours including vital postcard project time (and going to the farmers market – missed COMPLETELY).

I am off to do postcards but I wanted to let you know that I, coma-girl is still alive, or rather 60% of me is still alive, just don’t look below the lap blanket! Those cuts on my arms as well as other injuries are healing instead of just sitting there, indicating blood IS flowing to my extremities, thanks to badminton (Linda nixed the idea of cutting myself once a week as a baseline). And I hope you are having a rocking day. I am because I got some very cool mail, the best kind, mail I got for me, but forgot about! I ordered a stationery set, on sale, with free shipping, of this very cool Victoria Frances Stationary, which I can use to send out notes with any gifts I send (actually writing through the blood is something I am quite used to). I was unaware but she has a major cult following and several books and is a kick-ass artist. Not only does she do very fetching Vampire females but she also draws the hot and heavy look of the vampire male.
Yes, fun mail, the only problem with a set like this is that I don’t know what to do with it. I mean, too many choices and not enough envelopes. Still, it introduced me to this new (although I must have known briefly about her!) artist. She also does some lovely hetero romance…..I mean if the idea of romance is finding some ‘not so hard on the eyes’ male vampire to spend your time with before getting down to business….I mean biting…I guess I do mean ‘the business’ (all you kids reading ask your parents what that means!).

Along with was a gift I bought for Cheryl, a stationary set of Bettie Paige! It is rocking and Cheryl is very happy and here is a taste of one of the four different kind of pages, the envelopes and it even comes with stickers. I am sure Cheryl will put it to good/evil/fun uses.

As for me, I am enjoying the gift of post coma life by doing exactly what I was doing before.....WAY TOO MUCH. So back to that!


One Sick Mother said...


I am very glad Linda is spared.

But being Coma girl is not good -as you know. Please don't do that again.

I have very strange dreams, sometimes too which I attribute to seizure or whatever-the-fuck-is-going-on-with-my-brain activity.

That vampire art is cool. Both my kids -who are into Twilight, were drooling over different characters.

Stay safe and I hope today is a better day -for both of us.


Neil said...

I'm glad you're back in the real world (well, real for us); comas aren't really a lot of fun, I'm guessing. Not much dancing or partying, and no trips to Hawaii, when you're in a coma Travel agents are sensitive about their clients actually remaining conscious. I wonder why?

Much relief here that Linda's job is safe.Now, if Beth could be spared from comas, seizures, and deteriorating health for a while... Oh, well; I'll just have to send even more positive energy westward to you.

Love and zen hugs,

Neil said...

Oh, I forgot to mention that I agree with you about the vampire fiddler being VERY fetching! So is the lady whose, um, ear? is a bout to get nibbled.

The fiddler looks like she has large feet. Maybe the artist is just bette than most at drawing feet. (stops for yet another second look. At the feet.) Yes, the artist IS very good at drawing feet. Large feet.

That fiddler's not you in your next life, is she, Beth?

Love and zen hugs,
Now with 50% MORE zen hugs!!
(sorry, just feeling silly this morning)

SharonMV said...

Dear Beth,
So relieved that Linda's still got her job (I can understand her not feeling motivated). Please try to avoid anymore comas! I liked the picture of the little bat-winged girl in her coffin. And the new vampire art - very pretty people.

I am slowly getting better from the dreaded swine flu. But sinus infection & bronchitis are hanging on. I have things to send you, just need energy to finish & get them ready to mail.

Received the latest postcard last week. Be-lated thanks. I'll e-mail you soon.


e said...

Hi Beth,

I am so happy to hear Linda is keeping her job and the Hawaii trip is still on.

Now, if we could get you to have more seizure-free time in which to enjoy your cool art and other things...I'm sending the best energy your way, along with more stamps. I hope the rest of the weekend is much better for you.

FridaWrites said...

I am glad Linda still has her job but oof, Elizabeth girl, what a tough time! No more comas for you (I hope). I'm glad you're back with us!

I like the stationery, especially the Bette Page.

LOL, Neil.

yanub said...

I'm completely with Linda on the you not cutting yourself plan. It's a good plan.

So, is it Bob Barker you were seeing in your dreams? The dead game show host? Maybe there is a Bart Barker, too. It isn't like I know the names of many game show hosts. Bob Barker and Monty Hall--both dead. Alex Trebeck--alive last I heard. That exhausts my hosts trivia. If it's Bob, I'm glad to know he leads a full afterlife swashbuckling with marshmallow skewers. It's probably his reward for raising money for spaying and neutering pets.

TinkingBell said...

Glad Lindo is not on the downsizing pile! And sad you are having more interesting health times- but in good news - the yarn for your socks arrived and I will start them in a day or so!

Lene Andersen said...

Crap. Just... crap. Glad you went to badminton and showed the bastards what women can do, but the coma thing is not good. I will look at it the way you do - mucking up the here and now.

The stationary is gorgeous - very Anne Rice-ish. And I get why Cheryl likes her stationary - pretty hot.

Olivia said...

I'm glad that Linda still has a job, even if it is not a very motivating one at present. Not so glad about the comas and the cutting! But glad about badminton and reinstated blood flow. Also, Tinkingbell is knitting you socks which is wonderful! I am starting now but I think she is a much faster knitter than me.

Neil said...

I just went to find Victoria Frances; her website is en espaƱol, but she's a wonderful artist. And she's apparently a kindred spirit to you, Beth, since she's wearing corsets in the photos on her site. She's also a mere child of less than 30 years. Not fair! Where have the years fled since *I* was 30?!?

rachelcreative said...

Well I enjoyed your kind of light hearted delivery of recent events but I guess it was a pretty horrible time. Glad you're not dead yet and that badminton got the blood flowing again.

There is a package on it's way from me to you. Hope you like it.

There's a pop up drawing included which I forgot to photograph for my blog before I wrapped up the parcel (slow brain). So only Mr Creative and me have seen it. And soon you'll be only the third person to ever see it ;o)

I'm away for a couple of nights in North Wales looking at the sea and the mountains. I expect there will be a few photos to show (once I've decided which cameras to take!).

Diane J Standiford said...

Vampires, oh the sex games I had to play years how did I just KNOW you liked vampires? Vampires are back big time. Lt the sucking begin, or, I mean feasting!

Devi said...

Glad to hear that Linda still has a job, sorry to hear about everything else. Aside from finding awesome stationary, of course!

wendryn said...

First? I'm really, really glad that Linda kept her job.

Second? Your vampire art = eye candy.

I'm really glad you got to play badminton. I'm really sorry to hear about the health problems and the coma. We're both very worried about you.


cheryl g said...

Linda and I being unable to wake you is your bodies way of saying, "I REALLY need to rest now."

I am glad Linda's job is OK and I hope the rainy weather keeps the construction at bay. Please rest.