Today is official “Elizabeth brain-fuck” day (sorry people reading this at work!). Because what happens to me, happens to you, so besides waking up both incredibly fatigued AND incredibly horny (more on that later), I give you, the Hello Kitty S&M LOVE HOTEL in Osaka (we passed through there!)
I got this from Hello Kitty Hell, a site about a guy living IN JAPAN who HATES Hello Kitty and whose wife LOVES Hello Kitty, which makes pretty interesting reading, particularly each time his wife brings home a “new find”. I find the Hello Kitty sugar and sweet BONDAGE BED to be the good start of my day along with reader comments: “i am so glad i live in canada and my wife has no access to this room….or i would be chained to that bed.” And “I would love to go there with my boyfriend!” (I am sensing a gender divide here as shown in the following comment); “Awwwwwww to cute, I love it…my partner will look so cute tied to that bed….mmmmmmm thats a nice idea…show me to the nearest home depot babe,,, we have a room to build!!!” Is getting your man sex friend/hubby/boyfriend to BUILD you the Hello Kitty room you will tie him down in taking the S in S&M a little too far? Because getting guys to love Hello Kitty the ways girls do well, is difficult, so maybe surrounding him with sacchrine images while doing S&M is “This is so sweet!” for the girl, but, “This is wrong and I am going to Hell!” for the guys. Dunno.
I did however find the OFFICIAL Hello Kitty website for ordering stuff. So for those who want to try and get the S&M image out of your head, you can click here and it will take you to a page where you can create and send a Hello Kitty E-card (remember my email is mpshiel at hotmail.com!). No, there aren’t any kink or bondage e-cards.
You can however buy stickers of Hello Kitty emerging drunk from a Sake Barrel (as seen on the Japan Dai Boken) here! Look for them and more on postcards coming near you! And if you HAD to buy me a gift (not all at once now, I only need ONE of these), this Hello Kitty Blood Pressure Guage is pretty sweet (ignore the doctor in the comments section who says that only 3-10 year old girls and psychotics would find it soothing and fun - he will be fed to the tentacled one of pure evil still lurking about my apartment)
Anyway back to ME. Yesterday ended with a BANG. I posted the blog early, answered emails and comments and was just watching the first five minutes of a DVD, my first relaxation in a pretty hellish day when, BAM! Every light went out. Not just in my room, and computer and air conditioner (brand new) died but also dark in the next five blocks. Of course after writing about Corporal Punishment I immediately shouted out, “It wasn’t me!” (I occasionally tend to regress and think Linda is going to come and ‘punish’ me – but no, I didn’t do it and I didn’t get a spanking). So no it wasn’t me, but now I had the task of taking out my contacts by candlelight. So we went to bed, not much else to do.
This morning I wake up in pain AND fatigued AND incredibly horny. NOW I could have used some sexy spanking from Linda but NO, she had some meeting at work because she works for the government blah, blah (she always has these excuses). I was in that irritable mood where I couldn’t concentrate because when I would try to do something 'meaningful', the “Hey, let’s orgasm” part of my brain would distract me. But then when I close the work screen my body is like, “What, you want me to transfer into the wheelchair, go FIND the vibrators, then transfer into bed, and then get something going, are you kidding?” So I was like whining, “I don’t have enough dirty manga!” and trying to find some horny fan-fiction on line (yup, that’s really what I did today), so that I could orgasm without have to do anything but move my mouse hand. Only while reading I would be thinking/feeling, “This is kinda good but I think my body wants me to..um…give a hand, or a little friction rub.” But I was just too damned fatigued. And after three such interuptions without success I was going, “DAMN IT! THIS is a SERIOUS disability. Unable to summon the energy to masturbate?” But do I want THAT sent in as my long term disability evidence to the Canadian Government? Probably not.
Oh, I should mention that we had no water today. So another reason not to get TOO involved with lube and vibes if you know what I mean. The boiler was off for reasons unknown and so last night no power, today, no water. Yes, Canada IS a first world country, why do you ask? Not to mention I would be JUST in the middle of the good part of a fan-fic, the part where you start the rocking and the phone would ring from LIFE-LINE, “Hello Ms. McClung, we are getting power fluxuation readings on your life line, can you do an emergency test.”
Me in a (“not Now!”) voice, “Uh, right away?”
“Yes if you can hit that button right away that would be good.” (Yes it really would, wouldn't it! Oh, you mean the wrist button to summon help...)
Fine – except that it took four phone calls and almost an hour to get that sorted. Then next time, I am like, slumped against the wall, playing a fantasy in my head and Linda calls. “Hi,” she asks, “What are you doing?”
OHHHHHHH! I’m NEVER going to orgasm! And I'm not going to tell her so I am saying, "Um, just stuff..."
And she’s, “Do you want to go to a movie tonight?”
“Do you want to have chicken for dinner?”
“Have you called the framing gallery?”
Oh great now that feeling is just totally gone right away, flown across the orgasm mists leaving me irritable and cranky; “Why so many questions! Arg!” (Does that explain my sudden irritability a little Linda? I had to call later and apologize).
It was sunny out which meant I couldn’t go out. But with no water I had no home care, no assisted shower, no laundry to get done, no washing dishes. Just me, and the “itch” and lots of phone calls and finally I was giving into the tired going to go to bed. But then I said to myself, Is Elizabeth McClung a quitter!
Now before this becomes the misty eyed Disney 'story of the week' of the woman with extreme fatigue who against the odds kept at it, no matter what obstacles until orgasm was achieved, I had actually changed mental gears and was now thinking about postcards. Because besides lots of phone calls and answering some comments and getting, well NOT hot and bothered more like WARM and bothered. What had I accomplished? And here yesterday one of my readers emailed about how they went outside after being inside for a long time because of all that I did and blogged.
This made me feel ashamed. I mean here I was, coming up to 3:00 pm still in my nightie and I hadn't accomplished anything (get your mind out of the gutter, I am still talking about POSTCARDS!). I hadn’t even posted the four I did the day before. So I got out the postcards and the stickers and stamps and started working, determined to make the 4:30 posting. And, in an hour and a half I did FIVE postcards, and then changed, took the wheelchair outside and flew down the hill to the village, arriving at the post office at 4:29. So nine post cards went out today making the total 32 in five days.
So look in those letter boxes, they will start to arrive. And thanks to my readers who actually inspired me to get up and go out and do something, something I can talk in public about!
In YMCA news, everything is fine now and Linda did a mediation and they are aware of some of the problems and the manager might have me up to brief some of the staff on what is disbilism, (so if anyone actually has notes on that, and how it shows up in sports, now would be a good time to tell me). But it also opened the door for communication and hopefully when you come and visit me, you can borrow a wheelchair of mine and come to try badminton for yourself and we will both have a good time (if you don’t already have a wheelchair). Or if you DON'T have FMS or CFS or and are....um...how do I put it; ABLE BODIED (don't feel ashamed, it's okay, you have to accept yourself as you are, you didn't choose it!), then you don't have to use the wheelchair and can play me standing up.
Of course, by the time I made it BACK UP the hill, I was hurting. At the top of the hill, I was sitting at the corner with the streetlights and opposite on one corner was a five year old girl running around with her mom. On the other a couple 14 year olds girls talking and I started to think, “What kind of world will this be for these females in the next generation? Have I done enough?” And that seemed like I was almost having a “deep thought” which scared me, but then I had like this external thought which said, “You can’t take care of all of them, or every problem, you have done enough Elizabeth, it is time for you to move on.” And I was filled with a sort of peace.
Now that thought and feeling scared the crap out of me because “move on” means ‘dead’ in this weird “I am at peace with all things Lingo” and I had to almost slap myself and remind myself that “Hello! This world is about ME! And forget that ‘moving on’ crap because if you don’t hang on for a GOOD LONG TIME then you won’t be around to see what happens next, much less for the season three DVD release of Bones! And then who will watch it with Linda? Not ME, right!” Yeah, take that you DEEP thoughts!
So I had a moment of being at peace with my mortality and then I kicked my own ass and got out of it as soon as possible! Okay, weird day, I have the “nesting” thing, the “horny” thing and the “It is all right to go” feelings, and quite honestly, cannot deal with pregnancy now, and combine that with failing at the horny thing, and it is like, “GIANT sigh.”
I went to bed late because of doing all the postcards and woke up DURING when I was supposed to be at Boxing so will have to go next week for sure.
Instead of boxing I talked with Linda, watched two Anime episodes with her while we ate dinner and now we are buying Bras from the Victoria Secret semi-annual sale (ends in a few days). So, between buying bras from Victoria Secret and hunting down odd Hello Kitty Gifts to send to my readers, I am back being centered (centered as ME!).
Tomorrow, I will try to go out again (though the 30-40 minutes today almost put me into heat exhaustion at 20 degrees C. in direct sunlight – and maybe my wearing ALL black wasn’t the smartest move either, I am a slave to fashion…all the way to the hospital!). I will maybe do some wheelchair race training as I have a few weeks to go on that, if I am still strong enough to make it (Bah, who needs to be conscious at the finish, that’s the advantage of having a racing wheelchair with no brakes!). So, I promise that if I have less pain and more energy tomorrow I will NOT come back and tell you all about that ITCH being scratched. ...though I HAVE had requests to do more vibrator reviews and I have more vibrators so I wonder, maybe this weekend, if Linda is up for picture taking? I think of it not as sexual gratification but as a work of science and equality for women with disabilities! At least, that is what I say after it is over and I am writing it all up.
Oh, in the lazy ass news, the woman at Triumph who got the ergonomic report and who I gave Janet’s number to regarding the wheelchair emailed me as she wants ME to find, price and source this tilting wheelchair with a headrest. Come on! She already wants me to buy the keyboard and mouse I need on the promise that she will reimburse me. Plus, she was so delayed in getting the air conditioner, we bought and installed it ourselves. So now she can’t call a damn wheelchair store, or is it that she knows nothing about wheelchairs (though the OT’s gave her a two paragraph description AND picture). Ironically the paraplegic society ONE BLOCK from Triumph sent me an email listing someone selling a used wheelchair that seemed to fit most of those specs. Maybe I should email her their number and let them deal with her, because quite honestly, if she cuts me in for $10 an hour of HER wage, then I will call around and do her job. Until then…I have my own…um….urges….I means goals to achieve.
See, THIS is what happens when I can’t go outside because of the heat. Can you imagine what kind of things I will be shopping for online by August! Don’t leave out the credit card Linda!
14 hours ago