Thursday, April 24, 2008

An odd excuse and plans for this Sunday

I am going to pull out one of the most pathetic excuses for a short post: paralysis. I went down for my nap and woke up not only paralyzed on my entire left side and mostly paralyzed on my right side but I had crossed my left foot over the right while I slept (trapping it). I also had my hands twisted together. It was ludicrous. For once I was glad Linda has been home with the cough as I was reduced to making mild hooting noises out of the right side of my mouth until help came. “oot!” Pause “oot!” Puase.

This sometimes occurs when I am exhausted and I seem to have a “short” in the brain/nerves. Linda came and tried to communicate with me. “Do you want to get out of bed?”


“I’m taking that as a yes. I’m going to get your walker.”

“oot? Uet? Oot!”

“I can’t tell what you are saying.”

She separated the hands and my right index finger could squeeze so we played yes and no and I was TRYING to let her know that during this questioning she was sitting on my LEFT hand which I was hoping didn’t break anything since I couldn’t feel it. Anyway, she got that I was in no shape for the walker and got the wheelchair, lowered the hospital bed and transferred me out (wow, that medical equipment comes in handy).

It turns out that Dragonvoice 9 doesn’t work that well when all you have are weird vowel sounds. And I couldn’t type even with the right hand for a couple hours so Linda put me on oxy and gave the right hand the mouse (so I could play anime on the computer), and a drink with a straw (that suck and swallow very good for not breathing it). Anyway, about three hours later my left fingers unclenched. Which is where we are here.

That seems a good intro into my doing this 10K on Sunday. It goes around my neighborhood and starts about three blocks away and with all the training in Japan I figure I should use it before I lose it (and I will lose it because keeping up that level of effort was making too many breakdowns). Still, 10K, woo hoo!

Just to make sure I did 9K two days ago on what people told me was the first sunny day in weeks. I did the hill I knew I would have to do in the 10K. It is here, by the “duck pond” (we are an inventive bunch, we Victorian’s) and the tree.
Whoever organized the race is a little short term thinking as they have put the wheelchairs BEHIND the elite runners, behind the joggers, and behind the “moms with three wheelers or other baby carriers.” All very nice but even though there were only six wheelies last year the fastest finished in 25 minutes. That is 4 minutes plus a mile. Which means someone, maybe all of them will have racing chairs and I will be there in my everyday chair. Racing chairs are long and go FAST, like 40 MPH down the hills we are going down. And they put them BEHIND all the runners AND the baby carriers? The slowest wheelchair last year finished faster 1 minute slower than I did at my best as able bodied (I will make a new “slowest wheelchair time” this year, I promise!). Oh well, I guess that is what the ambulances are there for, to pick up all the able bodied runners run over by the wheelchairs?

It was a very good day on Monday for training as it was clear blue and the colors pop as Linda came and met me once my speech was all slurry and took this pic from the path I used as my training route. Pretty, but going up and down to ocean level means lots of hells….oh, I must have meant hills.

Actually, I think I have Ruth or Goldfish to thank for this inspiration of the 10K because when I did the 5K they said it was my “best time” and I did that about atrophy and the 5K. And I thought, “Hey, I just found I have atrophied a lot; and I won’t be able to do a 10K again….let’s make another ‘best time’” I think that is how the logic went. However it goes, I just want you to know this isn’t a typical harebrained scheme but a historically inspired scheme. There is a difference.

It would be nice if I could stop taking the continuous painkillers and muscle relaxants from the training I did on Monday. At least by Sunday.

Now, the question is: should I wear the black wings during the race or not? (If you don’t know what I am talking about look here)


em said...

Darling. Of *course* the black wings. And I think the new soot sprite should ride along.

I was a tiny bit worried about the 10K, but now that I know it's historically based...

Abi said...

Do you have a suitable justification for not wearing the wings? I doubt it! Naturally,we are expecting more photos :-D

Not So Desperate Housedyke said...

LOL I'm not sure if you meant it this way or not, but your description of the whole "oot ooot!" scenario was hilarious. And only 10k? Taking it easy are we? *wink* LOL

Just so you know, incase my memory and mind goes again, I didn't get a chance to read that last email you sent me, oh, like ages ago, before your trip and my move. And it doesn't look like I'm going to get my computer, which it's on, for two more months now, it being in storage, so if you want to resend it, that be great. Just wanted you to know, I was aware of it and not ignoring, just, distracted, reading problems, move and the such.

Are you using pot? If not, I highly suggest you get some from whatever compassion club is there. Not only should it help painwise, but help eating wise. And if smoking is out, how about pot brownies! *grin* Which is better excuse? The pot to eat the brownies or the brownies to ingest the pot? LOL *bounces around hyperactively*

I've started a new daily blog, so I can get SexAbility back on track (again)It's I went to reboot Typeractive, but I guess I deleted it at some point in a wonky head space moment! LOL Can't for the life of me remember why! LOL Anyways, if you're interested.

Crap when we can't move our hands to write, especially when we're writers, such as yourself. Glad to see your still marathoning!

P.S. that email you have for me no longer works. should now.

cheryl g said...

I vote you wear your wings too! You are flying so you'll need them...

See you at the finish line.

Lene Andersen said...

Oooh, ocean! And williow! Two of my favourite things (OK, the ocean wins over anything, but look at those branches!). You live in a seriously beautiful place.

Wings. Definitely. Aside from looking fabulous, it might confuse the other runners, momentarily stunning them into standing still and getting you out way ahead.

Glad you're a bit more functional. Gotta admit, "oot" is a lovely all-purpose word. If ya gotta be wordless, oot's much more charming than owrgh,say.

Neil said...

Thoe wings are just so YOU! Yes, wear them! Just be careful with that numb finger; don't want it getting caught in the spokes.

Perpetual Beginner said...

What's not to love about wearing the black wings?

Not so good thinking by the race coordinator there. Though it may be good for all those able-bodied people to actually see themselves getting skunked by the wheelchair racers. When the wheelchairs start in front, they never even see them!

Neil said...

You know, Beth, your blog is a black hole as far as time goes. I looked at the black wings photo (very nice) then clicked on an entry that looked interesting and finally ended up at November 17 last year (your lfe as a match girl entry).

Damn that Avril Lavigne! The anime Air is just a little too close to real life. Wish I could see it a bit larger and clearer though. And the song, while gorgeous, just hurts after your ever-sohonest post a couple of days ago.

Still, everyone dies, so I'll try not to get all maudlin again.

You're wonderful, Beth.

FridaWrites said...

Yes, you must wear the black wings!

Victor Kellar said...

Oh you and your wings and your flying and your giving in then fighting back and thinking about not fighting then doing it anyway ...

To anyone who cares to see, your wings have always been visible. To those who care not to look, let them see the black ones as you leave them in your dust

Hala said...

I want wings... no fair!

Gaina said...

If you don't wear the wings I will kick your ass :p

I have no clue why they want to keep you at the back of the runners, I mean 'plucky crips' make good tv, right?

Neil said...

hala: you do have wings - we all do. You and I just have to work harder to make them visible.

Beth: I shall try to cycle 10K in your honour on Sunday. It may be awkward, since I slid on some gravel a few weeks ago, and sprained a thumb while sliding about 2 metres. But the effort will be worth it.

Linda: YOU wrote that second card that arrived today! Lovely cards, both of them: the Mt. Fuji painting is perfect, and the geisha looks like she's in a wheelchair - perfect for you two.

yanub said...

No, don't not wear the black wings. Or do you maybe have some other color wings you've been hiding? In that case, don't not wear those ones.

I love your "oot, oot" conversation. It's rather like MD's side of the conversation when she's having a partial seizure. Even the "oot" is pretty close to her designated squeaks.

Blank said...

I'm going to have to agree with everyone else; wear the wings! And they'll look awesome with your red hair.

Neil said...

Just read what I posted after editing it too much. I suspect some further explanation is in order.

I was cycling to work, and hit a patch of gravel in a turn. I went down rather hard, nearly broke a bone in my thumb, and slid about 2 metres. I don't know how I ended up with such minor scrapes on one knee and one elbow only. And the thumb is only sprained, but it's going to bother me for a while.

A week later, I strained a ligament in one ankle while walking. Spring fever must be upon me...

I hope your paralysis goes away and stays away, Beth. That would really suck.

Raccoon said...

Black Wings, yes.

Unless you have some of a different color?

If you're going to keep using your manual wheelchair, you might want to try getting different rims. Ones with out wire spokes. They might be a little heavier, but they would probably be less likely to trap your fingers.

Oot, ooot.

Elizabeth McClung said...

em: Oh good, I like the idea of taking the "soot" along, I need to find him - will task that for tomorrow! Yeah, historically based insanity and pain! Er, I mean, well thought out and meaningful - we raise money

abi: Yes, since Linda is walking the 10K, all I need is to convince her to "run" part of it, and start ahead of me with the "joggers" and get a few shots of me in the crowd (while my plumage is still fine and proud).

Not so desperate housedyke: Good, nothing really as funny as a paralysis gone wrong. Well, when will I have a chance for another, in a month I will be much reduced.

Cheryl: trust me, you are a MAJOR motivation to finish the race, at least in a respecable time - the problem is, with Linda all a tuckered and me a wreck, who is pushing me home?

Lene: it was one of those days when I was thankful to have the strength to appreciate the apartment we got being close to both park and ocean. And though it is farther than I usually go by myself, having the Japanese trip confidence to go out for a wheel. It was very lovely, and I overtook a senior in a electric wheelchair which pissed him off NO end (he tried passing me again, but I flew by him a kilometer later for the win!).

Yes, the looking back and seeing black wings on a wheelchair approaching seems a good scare strategy now that I think of it!

I can also say "AR" or "aaaaar?" or even "raaaaa" but "oot!" is still the best for clear communication I find.

Neil: I will buddy tape it to my other finger to avoid spoke damage.

Elizabeth McClung said...

Perpetual Beginner: I wasn't the only one out training, there was a female elite and I was on a flat/slight downhill and kept up with her for 1.5 km. (she tried to get ahead and that just gave the incentive to give it that extra push - slow wheelies on the flat still beat legs).

Neil: Yes, the squirrel blogs are cool and I do find I identify with Air a little (like a LOT!), and those songs are a bit close to home as you say - I also like Kanon, by the same producer/company which ends with the main love interest in a wheelchair - on of the few companies that show females in wheelchiars in anime.

Fridawrites: well the vote is unanimous!

Victor: now I like your thinking. Although many psychologists I find don't do well when you talk in metaphor, "So you think you have wings do you? And when did this start?"

Hala: I got them from Hot Topic after Halloween for like $4 - I wanted I think 6 pairs but Linda said, "Lets try two and see how it goes" - see how it goes? They are wings? What is to think about?

Gaina: I will wear the wings if it doesn't rain, and take a bag in case it does - if it pours I am taking vasoline - 2 hours of rubbing in the thighs is NO FUN.

We have TV in Victoria?

Neil: Um, thank you for the 10K but I don't want to be the result of ANOTHER accident, so if you are in dubious condition, please take care of yourself first.

Yes, Linda wrote it, she is my "designated hand" when I can't write, but also throws in stuff I never would say (usally mushy things). Say hi to Fuji-san!

Elizabeth McClung said...

Yanub: I can't seem to find my white wings (sob) but will wear black with my black outfit if it dries in time (tip from Japan, do NOT wheel 5K in a corset, because a corset is STILL and the undersides of your underarms are not. This makes a sore red spot - just a tip for those thinking to wheel a 5K in a corset.

Blank: your wish is my command - to the wings!

Neil: What concerns me is that I HAVE a condition that makes me injure or lose function of parts of myself while you seem to do this with.....gravity? Are you safe to ride on Sunday?

The left side is weaker and I slur a bit more today but it seems to have gone away mostly. But it was well that I had care comeing for assisted showering today.

Raccoon: I had WHITE but I think they were taken away by God or mutual consent.

Yes, I might need those "guard things" - which I moved into a chair in my non-degenerative thinking I turned down the guards as I had no "plans" to put my fingers in my spokes - "plans" huh!


cheryl g said...

No worries, between Linda and me we can push you home. Linda can help on the big hills and I can cover the rest.

rachelcreative said...

If they're not going to interfere with your race time (thinking drag and aerodynamics here) then I say yes to wings too!

You can fly round :o)

Elizabeth McClung said...

Cheryl: I am glad SOMEONE has a plan.

Rachelcreative: cool - off we go then.