Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Total random stuff, including timing male orgasms

Thank you everyone for the comments to make me feel not alone at the hospital. It worked. Okay quick summary of the last few days: pain, drugs, sleeping, more pain, fear, talking sex with a straight woman, pain, difficulty breathing, crying, more pain, drugs for sleeping, finding strange bruises on my arms.

So boring old human condition stuff and nothing particularly blog worthy. I am a month into having no GP, and two weeks after the government paid home care company announced it was quitting. So whether anyone will show up for a shift is a bit of a lotto. The managers stated that I shouldn’t be getting information on other patients or on the company itself yet they call up my number and ask to speak to the person caring for me. Then they try to browbeat the person into taking another shift for another client later in the day. So....am I supposed to wheel myself out of hearing distance of my own phone? The care givers are already sending out applications to other agencies, so I expect it will get worse as time goes on. The company already said they “don’t have the technology” to let me know who is coming by email. That’s reassuring, so 1980's. So we asked for a schedule by fax. Nothing yet. I guess I will continue down the technology tree until I ask for my schedule scrawled with a bit of charcoal on a napkin?

On the bright side…..um, I had a dream where I was being hunted by guys with guns. No, I do have good news. First, I got my order of goth clothes including an autumn hoodie in purple and black lace by Lip Service decorated with little winged skulls. I will try and get a pic of me in it to post tomorrow (Assuming it isn’t raining AGAIN!). I got some goth tops and earrings of different animals in skeletons, like kittens. Nothing is as nice as NEW CLOTHES.

Second, I am recovering enough to do the Breast Cancer 5K this Sunday. I have waited all summer to do this 5K. Earlier, when I was stronger there were 5K’s and 7K’s I thought I could do but they were non wheelchair accessible (sections over gravel trails). Then I got weaker. Then my right shoulder and arm was all messed up for a month. But now I am back on target to do this 5K; pretty much the last of the season. And let’s face it, it way more interesting to do the Breast Cancer fundraiser than, for example, the Intestinal Parasite 5K.

Much of this last week has been very up and down both physically and emotionally and I have decided that if there is any chance of me surviving the winter without ending up in the big blue funk then I need a plan, or a lot of plans. So I am going to be trying to come up with a list of lots of different goals to try and do so that the day to day doldrums, pain, disappointment and getting dumped upon from a great height don’t consume me. I have come up with one so far: learn an wheelchair possible circus art (high wire wheelchairing? Wheelchair Trapeze?). If you have any ideas, let me know – I’m pretty open right now to suggestion. I also have a strong desire to occupy the health minister’s office as a protest to not having disability rights. The fact I haven’t been arrested for protesting in a city full of apathy makes me a bit ashamed of myself. Someone who moved here from Europe told me: Canadians act very nice and polite, but often, they aren’t very nice at all. I thought that was pretty accurate. Linda calls it the $1000 rule – because government agencies have to have their budgets match within $1000, so all decisions are made based on “will this risk us to go overbudget?” instead of “Does this person need help?” Or individuals worry “Will I be held responsible for this?” I don’t know why many Canadians hate taking personal responsibility but they do, at least on this coast.

In total trivia; a straight woman has told me that men orgasm very quickly – “1 minute, 2 minutes, 5 minutes.” It seems hard to believe this is what guys can spend days and months working toward: 2 minutes to orgasm. Is this the average? I am sure there are porn stars that take 42 hours, but I am looking for an insight into straight sex (or gay male sex), so if you have been keeping or collecting data, please post!

9 comments:

Daniel, the Guy in the Desert said...

I can definitely tell you that your straight woman got her facts skewed. Obviously she hasn't been timing gay men.
Straight men take forever to get to the starting gate, and then it's over in a minute. No imagination...
Yes, I hope you do the 5K run.
You could ask the health care company to send you the scheduling data by passenger pigeon.

em said...

I've slept with a lot of guys, and it's anywhere from 20 minutes to over an hour. I used to have boundary problems until last week.

I have been lurking on your blog for a bit now. Hi. I followed the link from Daniel's blog over here.

KateJ said...

Well done for taking part in the breast cancer fundraiser. I guess there's no way I can sponsor you from the UK? So I'm putting something in the breast cancer appeal box over here, in your honour.

Casdok said...

Glad to hear ir went well. And good luck with the 5K!
Good on you!

Ms. Pet said...

Re: Canadians taking responsibility. It's all part of the "Shut Up and Fit In," cultural attitude of BC. I think its because they are closer to the United States in regards to Attitude then they are to the rest of Canada, due to the Rocky mountains. I can assure you, ASSURE you, that back east it's like, well...french and english. LOL Because of Quebec, people simply cannot say, "Shut Up and Fit In," and throw everyone who doesn't "fit in," to the wolves. Plus the weather makes it dangerous to have a "me and mine, the rest take care of their own," kind of mentality. Anyone can be stranded on a road in a snowstorm at minus ten below and nobody wants to face that and not have a stranger open their home to you to sit out the storm. There's more of a "we're in the same boat," attitude out there. Here, well, here, getting emotional, getting engaged, "caring," is seen as a signal of "inferiority," I think. Being "out of control," or something. That's my theory. Now...

Back east has it's problems. Vancouverites are certainly more open to nude sunbathing and nude protests, open to the body if not sexuality. And there certainly can be apathy, etc. back east and PWD struggle there as well, but all in all, it's a completely 100% different culture back east. Way, waaaaay more influenced by Europe then out here, both western and Eastern Europe.

Good luck on your 5K is it this weekend? Did I miss that? LOL My reading online is the crap!

I have to agree with the "think their nice, but aren't really that nice." People view us as "nice and polite," because, english canadians seem to obsess about "image," and "appearence," alot. So surface wise, we come off as super nice. And that's fine as long as all you want is surface relationships, but scratch that surface and what one finds underneath is many, many times beyond "not nice," and moving into damn unfriendly. Certainly England is much further advanced on disability community, etc. People who are born in BC consider themselves and their communities very "friendly," and can't understand why those of us who come from other places are shocked by much of their apathy, scorn and behavior towards the poor, pwds, etc. Some of them don't seem to get that "Shut Up and Fit In," has gone the way of the dinosaurs. LOL *shrug* And hose who simply 'fit in," and are "inside," don't care about those on the outside, they always, always say, "it's not that bad." Of course not for you! You're cozy and comfy inside, not living on the margins! People Inside always say, "it's not that bad." LOL *shakes head and rolls eyes*

The Goldfish said...

Strange bruises are great fun. The best ones are those that pop up green and purple in places it would be almost impossible to bruise accidentally. That having said, I did once give myself a black-eye in my sleep...

Good luck with the homecare and the 5K. :-)

If your straight woman was eighteen and all the guys she slept with were eighteen, I wouldn't be surprised. It's not just physical; I kind of get the impression that in the same way some women have to learn to let go and enjoy sex, many men have to learn the same; only in their case it's easy to come, they need to calm down a bit to make the most of the whole experience.

Also, what isn't often spoken about is the variety of male orgasm. They vary just like ours do (well not just like ours do, but they do vary). It's not always the case that they can't simply start all over again.

Casdok said...

I have loved your blog, so have chosen you for an award, hope you will come by and pick it up!

Emotional train wreck said...

I have a great appreciation for the ease you have of expressing your thoughts, as well as different perspectives, and also the solicited opinion of others.

What truly turns me on, are those who profoundly affect me that I don't know whether to laugh, cry, kill myself or hug my dog.

Bravo.

Cooper said...

Good luck with the 5K. I, myself, am already committed to the Fungal Lesion 6.2K

As for straight male orgasms....

it depends on the situation, the partner, etc. Sometimes if there is an hour of foreplay, orgasms can be damn near instantaneous..if it's a straight jump in the sack...15 - 20 minutes is not out of the question.

More interestingly though, I find my orgasms last longer than my partners...and not just the actual climax but the "afterglow" can go on for 20 - 25 minutes. My experience is the women climax violently but the "bell curve" is a lot thinner in over all orgasmic experience.

My, what a sexy way to approach this...