Ever have one of those days when no matter how hard you work you can’t seem to make anyone happy; when all your relationships seem to have gone toxic? In fact sometimes whole weeks seem to consist of “put one foot in front of the other.” That pretty much sums up my week, plus having insomnia. Insomnia is like having a really bad cold or flu, it is impossible to remember how truly sucky it is until you have it again. Nothing quite as fun as lying there, hour after hour, trying to do something that used to come naturally, something which, at the end of the day, is out of your control – falling asleep. Then having naps later to try and get some sleep, only to wake up 20 minutes after falling asleep. I get insomnia once a year or so, and feel really bad for people who have it regularly, but then once it is gone, I go back to forgetting about them.
Our apartment manager, Fran, notable for only renting the apartment to us on the condition that she tell the owner that we are “sisters” instead of “randy sex-crazed lesbians”, has turned into the ultra annoying OCD type personality in the shared house who drives everyone insane. Fran, who I think would make a really good prison guard, spends much of her time patrolling to make sure that infractions are not being broken. On Monday, coming back from fencing, she was in the lobby when I returned, and though she recognized me, came to the door, and put her hand on the lock she would not open the door until I buzzed Linda and got her on the phone to verify my identity AS THE RULES STIPULATE.
Her new hobby over the last 10 days has been putting up notices; big long bold notices about new and bizarre policies. She has literally turned into the housemate who puts yellow notes on everything and everywhere. Monday it was a new notice to say that while the stairs could still be used (we live on the third floor) they needed to be used QUIETLY, which includes not running up or down the stairs, a sedate and quiet pace please. Then it was the notice that when using the laundry room, owners MUST set alarms in order to ensure that loads are NOT left in the washer or dryer for any period of time (which she actually checks regularly), Yesterday, in an attempt to get her to actually turn up the heat, she came into the apartment to check the regulator but then gave me a lecture on the amount of moisture allowed in an apartment and Linda a lecture on communicating only on the forms provided (in a room she has locked), today there is a new notice saying that when using the stairs or entering the building that the doors must be opened SLOWLY and that one must look carefully both ways before entering a hallway (honestly I don’t make this up). There are, as yet, no rectal searches when entering or exiting the building (there is an apartment open if anyone feels they need a bit of "correction & discipline" in their life).
She is really the least toxic of the people I deal with right now, but somehow the turning of our apartment building into Gulag 17 seems to fit in with the whole “grey life” right now. So, that’s it, nothing particularly cheery, or hopeful. Life sucks, one survives and hopefully it sucks less tomorrow. I do think it is interesting how humans, in general, have so few ways to make each other happy, accepted and loved, and so many, many ways to make each other feel hurt, damaged, abused, insecure, dislike, hated, or simply alienated. If humans have a genuine gift, I think it is at the speed and ability in which we can piss each other off. On that note, have a really nice drive home (and remember, the other drivers can’t actually hear what you’re screaming at them).
3 hours ago