Friday, April 21, 2006

Female Masturbation, X-Box 360 and Lipstick

A recent study has “proved” that sex for guys is 400 times more enjoyable than masturbation. But how does masturbation compare to the strange look guys get on their face while stoking their new X-Box 360, or better yet, killing a friend online with a head shot? Is it better than when you cyber on World of Warcraft? Better than blogging? How much?

Enough about you. Surveys have shown that 41% of women find masturbation BETTER than sex. When Kinsey did his survey 50% said they masturbated, now 82% do. Hooray! Particularly as studies show that for a woman, knowing yourself sexually only helps in mutual sexual satisfaction with a partner. On that note our 126 boxes of stuff arrived from the UK yesterday; including the small but varied collection of vibrators (dug them out of the boxes in like....an hour).

I’m not going to talk about The Rabbit except that one woman’s magazine in Britain found just over 50% of women had one or tried one. Who thought before Sex and the City that vibrators could be hip? Here are some insights from a journalist who worked as a Good Vibrations clerk if you aren’t getting the “Wooooohoooooo!” experience.

My favorite vibrator is my Lipstick Vibe which is small, compact (great for taking on vacation, on roadtips, on boring trips to the doctor's office, etc) and can be easily directed to different areas. Plus it allows you to make endless innuendo about wondering if you need some “lipstick”. It makes me giggle. Just turning it on and off is fun: Lipstick out, lipstick in.

This fav vibrator spot may soon be taken over by the waterproof Rubber Ducky which vibrates all over when you press the switch in his back. This was suppose to be a present for someone else which I just couldn’t give away (it’s so cute!). You can watch it twitter about the bath water, use it for neck messages or get busy with the beak.

A lot of women (and men) are hung up around the idea of female masturbation. It’s “not nice.” Well (insert rude swear word here) that! The idea of the virginal maiden waiting for a guy while not ever thinking sexual thoughts is not only outdated, it’s unhealthy. It comes down to this: “The main reason a woman should masturbate is because it feels good.” Female sexuality isn’t something permitted under the watchful eyes of men, it’s a right; you were born with it. Stop feeling guilty and start feeling good. It even burns calories.

Next time we can talk about that addiction which causes intense guilt, can break up relationships and is often chosen over sex: Chocolate.

16 comments:

Cheezy said...

I'm with that study, Elizabeth... I reckon sex is at least 400x more enjoyable than masturabation... and I don't even feel guilty when I whack one out off the wrist :)... so i'm a good judge... lol

NOTHING said...

i enjoy slotering my friends and strangers on x-box live...cus u no...i cant do it in real life with out repercutions

Michelle said...

Whenever my boyfriend loses a Mortal Kombat match against the computer, he punches himself in the thigh.

It's cute, but violent.

Thank god that doesn't transfer over into our sex life.

And as much as I love my vibrator, I'm not sure I could get off with a rubber duckie.

Just a thing I have.

elizabeth said...

I feel like I need to bleach my brain. LOL.

B.V. Brus said...

They've made duckies that vibrate now? Hnh. I guess that might change the experience.

I'll upgrade out of curiosity.

Elizabeth McClung said...

"And as much as I love my vibrator, I'm not sure I could get off with a rubber duckie."

Yes, well I used to be all "give me functional" but now I actually find myself reconsidering my position on the "Hello Kitty" vibrator - So cute. Will Hello Kitty let me down?

elizabeth said...

Fine. Fine. I now understand that I am the only living female without a vibrator. But now the choices are too much - hello kitty, ruber ducky, lipstick and so on. How's a girl to choose?

Elizabeth McClung said...

Seriously - I'd start with the rabbit - it is sort of the universal vibrator - gives virtually all women some satisfaction and about 50% get orgasms - and it's sorta trendy right now (I give them as presents, mostly to pastor's wives....but then that's me) so you don't have blush too much. Can be bought online from Good Vibrations and delivered in a brown box without logos. After that, you are on your own (though I personally think the vibrator extentions for the ipod should be avoided)

elizabeth said...

Right, well. Hnmphmph. I'm going to have to mull this one over...

B.V. Brus said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ceara said...

My partner got me a vibrator for valentines day. I never had one before. uhm..never seen one eaither except in pictures...*naive me*...the fun part was her 'showing' me how to use it...but I think I would get the same look on my face if they invented a x-box game where gays ran away fromt the christian right and I escaped...

kathz said...

I admit that I am also in the minority of women without a vibrator. Sad, perhaps, but I'm not going to feel guilty about it. Perhaps one day ...

elizabeth said...

Okay so - would one of those vibrating toothbrushes do the trick? I AM JUST KIDDING - don't anyone go trying it.

Elizabeth McClung said...

In one of the articles it talks about how for teen girls that is one of the most common items used - Linda and I were puzzling over that until she came up with a plan to tell the parents that the first one fell in the toilet so you have one brush for your teeth and.....

Elizabeth McClung said...

"I think I would get the same look on my face if they invented a x-box game where gays ran away fromt the christian right and I escaped..."

If they had a Wack-a-mole game with a Fred Phelps head - I would be there EVERY day.

Mrkgnao said...

Hmmmm...that's interesting ... I think there's some kind of bell curve going on - is that the current kind of graph I mean? God knows, I did English literature. Anyway ... I guess masturbation is technically-speaking likely to be better than bad-to-mediocre sex because at least you know how to get yourself off. But mediocre sex with someone you think you love and good sex beat masturbation into, err, a cocked hat because personally I enjoy the communicative/intimate aspect of two human beings rolling around together.